Time for What? Look, See, Pray

time to look edit cosmos

I’m at a loose end. We are self-isolating, so not seeing people as normal, and not able to do all the things that usually fill the days.

It is even a step down from being “retired.”

Both good and bad. For thirty years I have been “on call” or “on duty” serving God as a local church minister. That’s an unusual way of life: I’ve been privileged to be alongside people in their best, worst, and most humdrum experiences.

Long hours. Emotionally intense. Having to NOT be just a “professional” Christian, but a real one with a life-giving faith. It’s impossible to nourish others if my own life is dry as dust.

Retirement has been great and I have been able to useful helping in church and community, within the restrictions of health. Now I’m limited to home and the internet. One possible response would be to hibernate and wait for the virus to run its course. That doesn’t sit comfortably with an up-and-at-it enthusiast (and I’m sure there will be plenty of others feeling the same way).

When I finish writing this, I will go out in the garden and take the time to REALLY look at the flowers, watch the birds, and maybe take some photos.

We have been given a GIFT of time.

Time to look, time for prayer, for reflection on life, for remembering family and friends. I have time to write. I have dug out my Q-Chord (electronic autoharp/synth) and started to practice – so I’ve been given a gift of music too. I have also received a gift of more time with Juliet (she is working from home) and that is precious.

So, am I at a “loose end” or I am unwrapping a gift that can enrich my life as a result of for the first time in memory HAVING TIME ON MY HANDS?

When all this over, and life resumes “normality”… will we have taken the time to look and decide what is really important and worth keeping? If we just go back to how it was, we will have missed an opportunity.

Of course this is a challenging time, and for many of us there may be grief and loss. Financial pressures are squeezing us all. Getting essentials to everybody is proving hard for Government and society generally. Some are being selfish so-and-so’s whilst others are being amazingly kind, generous and loving. We will need a great deal of kindness to heal the wounds of this plague. We don’t know what shape the future will take, but perhaps our choices of how we use our time can shape it for the better. This time IS a gift. It’s time IN our hands, not “on” them. We can use time or waste it.

May God’s peace keep you free from fear, and God’s Spirit give you courage and strength, and may the Son of God lead you in a new future of hope and wisdom.

River of Tears

Today – the 75th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz & Birkenau, the infamous Nazi death camps. It is Holocaust Memorial Day: and we should never forget. Words are inadequate but they are all I have. This is my Lament for the Jews, Gypsies, cast-outs, unwanted, despised… all the victims of what happens when evil thoughts are let loose.

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Tears unheeded
shed on concrete floors
wiped away by skeletal kids
Lungs choked
by noxious hatred
with genocidal solutions

Lest we forget
Holocaustal reminders
should make us cry
so our generations
never repeat killing
by decree of expediency

Camps of Death
liberated by shocked soldiers
to save the few
Too late for millions
we must never forget
Auschwitz and Birkenau

Never again
for God’s sake
and ours

And theirs, hid in a river of tears.

(c) Richard Starling, Holocaust Memorial Day, 27th Jan 2020

Faithfulness and Grace- Look, See, Pray

Today was a GOOD NEWS day- for me. I want to shout out “God is good!” which is, of course, true… but I must restrict myself a bit and say only that God has been good to me at this moment in time. This is not to be boastful or claim any special “holy” status, but because God is in His essential nature faithful and loving: and He gives grace not because “we deserve it” but because He CHOOSES to love the unfaithful.

I was diagnosed with bowel cancer this autumn. It was serious enough to require urgent major surgery, and our wonderful N.H.S. acted swiftly and effectively. Getting over the surgery has been painful and seems slow. But today I visited the oncologist about follow up treatment (chemotherapy). My expectation was six months of chemo.

Chemotherapy not required… the doctors think I am 85% likely to be clear of cancer; annual scans will look out for any possible regrowth. You can imagine the relief… the sense of getting your life back, the lifting of the gloomy shadow of fear and doubt.

Many people have prayed for me (I am truly grateful) and practical support and love has been showered on my life. I have felt a sense of God’s presence; and known other dark moments where faith felt like a mouse squeaking in the cellar waiting for the cat to pounce.

This evening I have sent the good news round to friends and family. I looked in the book of Psalms hoping to find a good “praise verse”… and I found this.

Psalm 91:14-16 (NLT)
The LORD says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honour them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.”

God is faithful. I do love Him, I trust Him, and I need Him. It’s just that I’m not as faithful in my faith as He is. Do I have any right to say God has blessed me? No, if I am trading with God… “Hey, God, if you scratch my back… and I’ll try to be nice and be good…”

It doesn’t work like that.

I know my own weaknesses, and the things that trip me up. I wish I was 100% perfect but I’m not (yet).

Father God has reminded me this evening that He IS faithful, the One of eternal loving-kindness. He has also reminded me that GRACE is what is given when my faithfulness falls flat on its face. A namesake of mine, St Richard, was Bishop of Chichester from 1244 to 1253 and gave us a prayer that I treasure. It’s my faith-response to the gap between God’s faithfulness and my own.

Thanks be to you, our Lord Jesus Christ, for all the benefits which you have given us, for all the pains and insults which you have borne for us. Most merciful Redeemer, Friend and Brother, may we know you more clearly, love you more dearly, and follow you more nearly, day by day. Amen.

God has been good to me- and I really want to love Him better, and be more like Jesus. I’m depending on His faithfulness- AND still on His grace. Left to myself, I can, do, and will fail. The reason God has “been good to me” today is that HE won’t take my weakness and failures as the last word. I’m proud of having a Father like that. My hope is that more and more of us will come to know and understand and experience that Fatherly Love.

 

Secret and Sacred – Look, See, Pray

Deep down in the valley the trees hide their treasure. Down there a river flows, water brown from the peat washed off the moor. A track wanders between the trees with fallen leaves as a rustling carpet for dogs and kids to play in. Birds and secretive mammals watch carefully those who pass by: squirrels swear from their lofty seats and throw acorns to encourage departure.

If you go far enough, a graceful stone bridge arches the water so drovers and foresters can cross.

Go further, and find a stump or stone. Just sit in silence. No traffic sounds, no signal on mobiles, just the birds, the beasties and the breeze. Stay long enough, and a deeper stillness slips into your soul.

Far from distractions, the silence becomes comfortable. Only natural noises can be heard, forming a gentle background of peacefulness which allows the silence of the soul to bring rest.

The secret place becomes sacred. The signature of the Creator embellishes the quiet beauty with an invitation to inhabit the peace… and allow the Presence of Christ to open a chapter of awareness and grace in the Book of Life.

Words are important- but they are not the only speech. Silence is eloquent.MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERA

All it needs is a secret place where our heart can meet God’s faithful fathering. This is one such place. Have you found yours?

Here is a refuge, a sacred place of worship and reconciliation. Nearer, my God, to You.

Practice this sacred silence, and it becomes a peace within the soul, available any “when” and every “where.” God IS with us. We simply need to be aware- and engage.

Clouds or Sun? Look, See, Pray

It has been a day of drama and turmoil with emotions and divisions hitting the headlines. Opposing viewpoints divide families, communities, and a nation. Issues of trust and accusations of underhand tactics are sprayed about with little thought of long-term consequences.

Whatever your personal opinion on the current events, I hope you can join me in a prayer that God may bring wisdom, mercy and compassion to us all.

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Lord, in stormy skies and stormy words we are overwhelmed. Please help us to seek justice, mercy, and reconciliation. May Your will be done on Earth as it is in heaven.

Amen.

Unbeaten- Look, See, Pray

Gardening is in the blood of my family.  The appreciation of beauty was instilled early, together with the realisation that the gardener never has full control. Jobs take longer, pests invade, or the good old British weather trumps your hand.

In my mind’s eye, there is a rose bed out front. Problem is… the roses are out the back, in pots!

Clearing the overgrown shrubs and brambles takes longer than I hoped. Our clay soil also has a mind of its own- too boggy in winter, rock solid in summer.  Yet there is hope.

Last week the rain came lashing down. One of my “David Austin” roses, Boscobel, had just opened up before the apocalypse began.

Boscobel 002roses 0618Last year the rose looked gorgeous.

It has struggled this time round. Pot life doesn’t suit it well. Fewer flowers have bloomed.

This time the rain tried to dissolve the rose!

The petals became translucent, and the colour changed. Very strange to see.

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Gardeners are patient; and they don’t give up easily. I’m taking this semi-dissolved rose as a symbol of hope. The plant has survived. It has not been beaten.

Life lesson?  You are never beaten until you don’t get up anymore.

Life rarely turns out as we expect or “plan”… and life brings disappointments as well as triumphs. Quite a lot of the time living is just about keeping on going, doing the ordinary,  believing and trusting that God won’t let us go.

Prayer point:  Has there been a deluge on your rose recently? Something that has spoilt your dreams, rattled your cage, threatened your future security?

Make that the focus of your prayer. Trust the Lord to bring fresh growth, renew the damaged roses: and maybe even see something beautiful or insightful in the situation. My translucent rose has a magnificence of its own, even with its imperfection. Study the consequence of the storm, look for beauty in the moment. Rain affected the bloom- but the plant survives. Unbeaten.

Lord, whatever is going on right now, and however it looks in the middle of the deluge, may Your Spirit renew and keep me UNBEATEN.  The best IS yet to come. Amen.

 

 

Theory or Practice? Look, See, Pray

Theory is great. It’s an idea to be played with, debated, discarded or adopted.

Moving from theory to practice is different. As I watched the para-gliders taking off over the Alpine peaks and valleys, I firmly decided this was not for me. Vertigo and perpendicular cliffs don’t really make a good mix.

Some were experts. One was not. Most took off smoothly. One did not; it took several attempts, flailing on the edge. Phew!

Once airborne the para-glider is committed. Presumably they enjoy the adrenaline (and the views are spectacular!)

Christian faith has similarities. We can play it safe, keep it theoretical, and fail to put faith to work. Bet God loves that.

Or we can step out, taking faith for a flight, and believe that God keeps hold of us when we try to fly.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAA prayer for the moment:

Lord Jesus,
I took you at your Word and I’m ready to take off.
My faith is pretty flimsy, though, and it’s a long way down…
Please hold me up and help me reach the end of this flight.

I’d like to ask You to make sure I enjoy the trip.
But I suspect You don’t guarantee that.
You do say that we are working with You
to change the world and bring Love to people everywhere.
That sounds worthwhile, if a bit alarming!
Me? Really make a difference?
Well, me PLUS You- that should be OK.

The hardest bit is taking that first step.
Lord, please, may You Spirit help me find courage
and then determination- I choose to trust You.

Lord, I don’t know what I will see on this adventure.
I don’t know exactly how or when it will finish-
but I think it could be the biggest and best step for me.

You say “Follow.”
I’ll say “Yes.”

Please forgive me when I’d rather say “no” and stay a theoretical Christian… I want to live by Your purpose, and remember that You went all the way to the Cross.

Don’t let me fall… it’s such a long way down.
Here we go, Jesus! Take a good grip, please,
and don’t let go! Amen.

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